第二天早上她咬紧牙关从床上爬起来，走进了浴室。她怕滑倒，不想冒险洗淋浴，就只打算大致地擦一擦身。克里斯蒂安正在往托盘里摆放果汁和水果，她却自己一瘸一拐地过来吃早餐了，令他大吃一惊。
“I was just bringing it,” he said, sounding harassed.
“我正准备送过去呢，”他吓了一跳。
Nicky threw her spoon on the floor, missing the plastic mat under her highchair. Blobs of oatmeal hit the rug.
妮基把她的小勺子扔到地上了，塑料地垫没有垫在她的儿童高脚椅下面，麦片粥溅到地毯上星星点点。
She saw Christian grimace and reach for a paper towel. “Would you rather I went back to bed?”
她看到克里斯蒂安扮了个鬼脸，伸手去拿纸巾。“你宁愿我回去睡觉是不是？”
“You've made it this far. You might as well stay.” He slid her tray onto the table and bent to clean up Nicky's mess.
“既然你已经走这么远了。你最好还是待在这儿吧。”他顺手把她的托盘放到桌子上，弯下腰去清理妮基的残局。
Poor man, she thought. No wife any more, and a daughter who's a bundle of mischief. It won't be easy for him, even with a nanny.
她心想：可怜的男人啊，妻子离世，还有一个调皮捣蛋的女儿。就算是有保姆，他也可真不容易。
She levered the chunks of fruit clumsily up to her mouth, determined to manage on her own. Half an hour later she lurched back to bed, and lay there missing Jan, thinking of their childhood together, weeping quietly for all the future times they'd never share. Eventually she dozed—only to be woken by Christian at her bedroom doorway.
她笨拙地将大块的水果送到嘴边，下定决心自力更生。半小时后，她步履蹒跚地回到卧室，躺在床上回想起简来，回想起她们的童年。想到未来无法再与简共度欢乐时光，她默默擦起了泪来。当她终于要沉沉睡去——却又被卧室门口的克里斯蒂安叫醒。
“Amy's there to watch Nic. Are you ready to have your hair washed?”He carried a dark green waterproof coat over one arm and an outdoor chair under the other. He still wore his white toweling robe.
“艾米在那儿看着妮可。你准备好洗头了吗？”他拿来一件墨绿色雨衣，一只袖子穿在手上，另一只盖在户外躺椅上。而他依然穿着他那件白色浴袍。
Fiona's pulse-rate increased. The robe covered him decently, but now there was a palpable air of the bedroom about him. Her eyes roamed all the way up from his sinewy bare feet to his unshaven face and somewhat tousled dark hair.
菲奥娜心跳加速。尽管他穿着得体的浴袍，但眼下他的卧室充满着他的气息。她从下至上打量着他：赤裸的脚踝到未曾剃须的脸庞，及有些蓬乱的黑发。
“Don't panic, I'm going to cover you up, not undress you,” he said, misreading her expression. He carried the chair through to the bathroom, returned with one of the hand towels, and stood beside her.
他误读了她的表情，说道，“别慌，我得先把你盖起来，而不是帮你脱衣服。”他把椅子搬进浴室，出来的时候手里拿着一条毛巾，站到她身后。
She pushed the covers back and dug her toes into the luxurious carpet. Christian held out his hands.
她把雨衣向后推了推，足尖玩弄着豪华地毯。克里斯蒂安伸出双手。
“Up,” he said, grasping hers and lifting her carefully. He arranged the towel around her shoulders, taking care that none of her hair caught underneath. Fiona held her breath as his hands roamed over her neck, rescuing wisps of it.
“高一点，”他说，轻轻地抓着她的头并往上抬了抬。他把毛巾垫在她的肩周围，留神别把头发夹在下面了。当他的手在她脖子周围拨弄时，菲奥娜屏住呼吸才得以留得一丝气息。
“I thought if we put my old fishing coat on you back-to-front we wouldn't get any of your dressings wet. Or your nightgown, of course.”
“我觉得如果用我的旧渔衣遮着你，就不会把你衣服打湿了，当然，或者你的睡袍。”
“The dressings are mostly supposed to be waterproof,” she said. “But okay.”
“这些衣服大都是防水的，”她说，“但还好。”
He shook the coat out. “Don't worry—it doesn't smell fishy.” His mouth kicked up at the corners into a slight smile.
他抖开渔衣。“别担心——闻起来没那么腥。”他嘴角微微上扬，浅浅一笑。
Fiona raised her arms as far as she comfortably could, and slipped her wrists into the sleeves of the big garment. Christian drew it upward, stepping very close and leaning around her to fasten the top buttons behind her neck.
菲奥娜尽可能地伸展胳膊，将手伸进大渔衣的袖子里。克里斯蒂安往衣服上拉，为了系紧她脖后的口子而靠得很近。
Her face became almost buried against his chest. The same wonderful scent from the other evening swirled all around her. His scent. The enticing personal scent that her sister had been able to enjoy every day.
她的脸几乎完全埋在他胸口。另一晚上，同样微妙的气息伴她左右。他的味道。她姐姐曾每晚都能享受到的他诱人的味道。
She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to ignore the scenes that drifted under her hot trembling eyelids—Christian and Jan, twined together in this very room.
她紧紧闭上眼睛，试着不去想眼皮底下幻现的场景——这个房间里，克里斯蒂安和简缠绵的情景。
“That ought to do it,” he said, moving behind her to fasten the last of the buttons. “You look a bit… unusual…”
“应该这样，”他说着便走到她身后系紧了最后一颗纽扣。“你看上去有点…不太正常…”
“But this isn't a ‘usual' situation,” Fiona said as she reached for her crutches.
“但这本来就不是个‘正常’的情形，”菲奥娜说着伸手去拿拐杖。
His grin became wider, and he tugged at the belt of his white toweling robe as he entered the luxuriously appointed en suite bathroom.
他笑得更肆无忌惮了，走进豪华的卫浴套间，白色浴袍的腰带拖拉在地上。
“Not quite ‘the emperor's new clothes', either.” He shrugged the robe off his shoulders and tossed it over a hook.
“也不完全是‘皇帝的新衣’。”他耸了耸肩，把衣服扔到挂钩上。
All of Fiona's fantasies collided. Christian—tall, dark and nearly naked. Well, wearing perfectly respectable black swim-shorts she had to concede. But there was so much of him. Such long streamlined arms. Such broad shoulders. A beautifully sculpted chest that took her breath away and positively encouraged her fingers to play in the dark hair that she'd glimpsed at the neck of his unbuttoned shirt the previous evening.
菲奥娜所有的幻想轰然倒塌。克里斯蒂安——高，黑，几乎赤裸。好吧，她不得不承认他穿着非常得体的黑色泳裤。但他还是露太多了啊。如此颀长的流线型手臂，如此宽阔的肩膀，漂亮的如雕刻般的胸膛，令她目瞪口呆，也使她更想把玩前一天晚上透过衬衫的缝隙瞥见的黑色毛发。
One of her hands rose and almost touched him—smoothing the air just a fraction away from the soft shining haze over his heart.
她情不自禁举起一只手，几乎触到了他——及时停下，平行滑过他的胸前，他胸毛像一团柔软闪光的雾霭，让人看不清他的真心。
“Lucky Jan,” she gasped, snatching her hand back far too late. “Sorry.”
“幸运的简，”她叹道，想要收回手来却已经太迟了。“抱歉。”
“Like me, do you?” he teased.
“你喜欢我吗？”他逗趣儿道。
“No—of course not. I mean…there's a lot of you, isn't there. You're a bit…” she mumbled in confusion.
“不——当然不了。我的意思是…有很多人，不是单指你。你有点儿…”她语不成句，含糊混乱。
“I'm a bit what?”
“我有点儿什么？”
“You're a bit too much. To take in at a glance.” She found it impossible to tear her eyes away. She wanted more than a glance. She wanted to roam over him at her leisure, enjoying all his masculine hardness and strength, his warmth, his smoothness, his roughness.
“你有点太过了，一眼看过去。”她发现自己简直挪不开眼。她想要的可不仅仅是一瞥。她希望随心所欲，想看多久看多久，仔细欣赏他所有的刚劲和力量，他的温暖，他的光洁，他的粗粝。
She had a too-fast glimpse of his taut golden belly and long thighs before she subsided into the chair. Christian put her crutches aside and stepped behind her to turn on the water. She sat there overcome with embarrassment and longing.
她极迅速地瞥了一眼他那紧绷的金色肚皮和颀长的大腿，然后才慢慢坐到椅子上。克里斯蒂安把她的拐杖放到一边，走到她身后打开了水龙头。她坐在那儿，心中充满了尴尬与渴望。
“This might have been a very stupid idea,” he said. She heard a small frustrated curse as well.
“这也许是个笨办法，”他说。她还听到了一声泄气的咒骂。
What was he really thinking? That they'd be close, wet, and far too private? That was exactly her take on it.
他到底在想什么？他们会靠近，湿身，但不涉及私人么？这正是她的想法。
He moved about, whistling softly to himself as he adjusted the temperature of the water. Fiona kept her eyes resolutely turned away. Then she caught sight of him in the big mirror on the side wall. His wet black shorts clung close against his hips, emphasizing the long line of his back and the tight curve of his butt. The increasing weight of the water in the fabric made the shorts sag a little lower. They hung across his hipbones in a gentle arc.
他边走去调节水温，边自顾自地轻轻吹着口哨。菲奥娜坚决地别过眼去。然后她又在墙上的大镜子中看到了他的身影。他湿漉漉的黑色短裤紧贴着臀部，凸显了背部长长的线条和臀部紧致的曲线。布料吸收了水分坠得更低些了，短裤以轻微的弧度悬在他髋骨之间。
Fiona itched to touch him. His thighs shone as the water streamed over them, defining the shape of the strong muscles that flexed under his golden skin. Higher, his chest hair lay sprinkled with glittering diamonds as the overhead lights caught the water droplets.
菲奥娜恨不得触碰他。水流过他的大腿，闪闪发光。金色的皮肤下，强壮的肌肉轮廓更加鲜明了。高一点，水珠折射的灯光下，他的胸毛星光点点，像闪光的钻石。
When she stretched a little, she saw herself as well. She looked totally ridiculous. His huge green waterproof coat dwarfed her. Her unwashed hair sat flat against her head. She'd rarely felt so unattractive. What was she thinking of—spinning daydreams about a man as gorgeous as Christian when she looked such a pathetic frump?
当她稍微伸展的时候，也看到了自己的身影。她看起来可笑极了。他硕大的绿雨衣使她相形见绌。她未洗的头发贴在头皮上。她很少感到像现在这样毫无魅力。她在想什么呢——做着关于克里斯蒂安这样俊美男人的每日梦，而事实上自己看上去可怜又邋遢？
This is Jan's husband. You cannot have him.
这是简的丈夫。你不能占有他。
“Tip your head back,” he instructed, cupping her jaw in his hand and tilting her until she rested against something warm and resilient. She turned her eyes upward and found her head pillowed against his belly with a view of his body in reverse…up to his impressive chest and shoulders and hungry handsome face.
“头往后仰，”他命令道，手托着她的下巴，然后倾斜她的脑袋直到她靠到一个温暖而有弹性的东西上。她抬眼看到自己的头正枕在他的腹部，反向看着他…那令人印象极深的胸膛和肩膀，和那英俊的脸庞。
“Close your eyes.” He raised the spray-nozzle to wet her hair. “Keep very still. I'll try and avoid the dressing over your eye.”
“闭上眼睛。”他举起花洒打湿了她的头发。“别动。我会尽力避免弄到你眼睛上。”
The warm water trickled over her scalp and down over his big body. Fiona sighed as the fingers of his other hand smoothed through her hair, directing the water, shielding her face. He turned the nozzle off and reached for the shampoo.
温水流过她的头皮，淌到他庞大的身体上。菲奥娜叹了口气，他另一只手的手指正平滑地在她发间穿梭，顺着水流的方向，遮着她的脸庞。他关上水龙头，伸手去拿洗发水。
“Tropical Creme”, he murmured, reading the label as though to fill the sudden silence.
“热带乳”，他嘀咕道，读着标签仿佛是为了缓和这突然的寂静。
“It's something the salon recommended.” She kept her eyes resolutely closed.
“这是沙龙推荐的洗发水。”她依然坚定地紧闭着双眼。
*
Christian drizzled shampoo over her hair and started to massage it in, kneading sensuously but softly, careful to avoid her injuries. The fruity fragrance surrounded them both. He bent a little lower, enjoying the closer view of her face. One side was entirely undamaged, her skin smooth and so much paler than his hands. Her dark lashes lay golden-tipped against her high cheekbones. Her lips were full and soft.
克里斯蒂安把洗发水抹在她头发上，动手按摩，温柔地揉捏着，小心翼翼，生怕她伤着。果香环绕，他身子弯得更低了，近距离欣赏她的脸庞。一边脸完好无损，她皮肤光滑，比他的手更加白皙。她那黑色的睫毛在颧骨上方高高翘起，嘴唇饱满温润。
You are my wife, yet not my wife…
你是我未过门的妻子…
He supported Fiona's head in one big palm and massaged behind her ears, down to her nape, then up to her crown.
他一只大手撑着菲奥娜的脑袋，按摩着她的耳后，然后是颈背，又回到头顶。
“That's heaven,” she murmured, giving him the excuse he needed to keep touching her. He continued running his fingers over her scalp, working the lather into every strand of her hair. The slippery soapy sensations coursed through his big body, finding their mark all too easily. He gritted his teeth.
“真是天堂啊”，她低声道，给了他一个继续抚摸她的借口。他手指继续按摩着她的头皮，把泡沫抹在每一根发丝上。滑溜溜的肥皂的感觉从他硕大的身体中穿过，很容易捕捉到这种感觉。他紧咬牙关。
It shouldn't be possible for this drowned rat of a woman, totally concealed in his old waterproof coat, to have such an outrageous effect on him. And yet, whenever he'd been in her company through all the years of his perfectly happy marriage, she'd lit sparks that smoldered and refused to be extinguished.
这个像湿猫一样的女人，完全淹没在他那件旧雨衣里，不应该对他产生如此之大的影响啊。然而，这些年来，虽然他处于完美又幸福的婚姻关系当中，但每次和她相处。都会擦出隐秘的火花，绵延不绝。
Even the one swift kiss he'd given her as a ‘welcome home' from hospital had got way out of hand.
甚至连一个“欢迎回家”的轻吻都无法掌控。
This was so wrong. Nothing could ever come of it. No matter how much Fiona invaded his dreams—and his daydreams—she wasn't attracted to him in return. Politely stand-offish, more like.
这真是错得离谱。不会发生什么的。无论菲奥娜如何侵蚀他的梦——他的白日梦——她并没有被他所吸引。而更像是有意礼貌地疏远他。
Why would I expect her to be? I'm her sister's husband. Her sister's choice of man, not her choice.
为什么我对她有所期待呢？我是她姐夫，她姐姐选择的男人，不是她的。
But if things were different…if the timing were otherwise…would there be a chance? He compressed his generous mouth and sighed.
但如果情况有所不同…如果时机使然…是不是还有机会呢？他瘪了瘪嘴叹了口气。
He had to accept she lived a glamorous life on the other side of the world, which suited her to perfection. She wouldn't relinquish it for a secondhand man with a ready-made family—especially one who couldn't decently make any move toward her for months yet.
他不得不接受现实：她是活在另一个世界的人，她的生活充满魅力，她很适合那样的生活。她不会为了一个成过家的男人而放弃自我——尤其是一个这几个月来都未曾得体地走近她的男人。
He reached out for the spray-nozzle again and tilted Fiona's head to pillow it against his belly. The water cascaded over her hair and down his aroused body.
他又伸手去拿花洒龙头，把菲奥娜的头靠在他的肚子上。水流如同瀑布般流过她的头发，淌过他兴奋的身体。
He rinsed until her hair shone clean and bright.
他冲洗着，她的头发变得又干净又有光泽。
“Shampoo again or conditioner this time?”
“再洗一次洗发水还是用护发素了？”
*
His deep voice reverberated through the back of her head and Fiona opened her eyes to find him bent over her, dark pupils big enough to drown in, his face only inches away.
他低沉的声音在她的后脑勺回响，菲奥娜睁开眼睛，看到他正俯身在她身上方，硕大的黑色瞳仁几乎将她淹没，他的脸近在咫尺。
“Conditioner please.”
“护发素吧。”
He turned for the bottle, and something firm nudged the side of her neck. It was gone in a second or so as he swiveled back, but she knew without doubt what she'd felt.
他转过头去拿瓶子，什么硬东西碰到了她的脖子。虽然只碰了一下，但是她确定她感受到了。
So he wanted her too?
那么他也想要她么？
She flushed as hot waves of desire shot through her body yet again, inciting a riot in her whole nervous system, burning with deep unsettling heat. She'd never felt so inappropriately filled with desire, so overwhelmed with wanting. She lay back against him, helpless, agonizing over what she could do to resist him.
她脸红了，强烈的欲望再次汹涌而来，在脑海中引发了一场骚乱，极度不安的燥热熊熊燃烧。她从未有过如此不适当的欲望，而且几乎快被欲望之波淹没了。她躺在他身上，无助却又苦苦挣扎想要反抗他。
She nestled her head a little more comfortably against his belly but could make no further contact.
她把头舒舒服服地靠在他肚子上，但并没有更进一步的接触。
*
Christian groaned to himself and eased his hips away as he concentrated on squeezing the fragrant creamy liquid onto her hair. He set the bottle aside and once again cradled her head in his palm as he resumed the sliding gliding massage, thinking it was heaven to touch her and hell not to be able to take things further.
克里斯蒂安自顾自地抱怨着，臀部逐渐放松，全神贯注地把芳香的乳脂状液体挤压到她头发上。他把瓶子放到一边，又缓缓捧起她的头放在手掌中，继续平滑地按摩。想到能触到她简直就是天堂，而不能更近一步便是地狱。
He rinsed her hair clean, squeezed out the worst of the water, and reached for one of the big fluffy towels. He draped it over her head, and began to rub her hair gently dry. The angle was difficult. He moved around in front of her, careful to keep his body hidden by the towel.
他把她的头发冲洗干净，挤干水，伸手去拿蓬松的大毛巾，披在头上，开始轻轻擦干头发。这个角度有些不方便。他走到她身前，小心翼翼地将身子藏在毛巾后面。
And was astounded to feel Fiona's hands reach out toward his hips as though to steady herself.
他惊讶地发现菲奥娜的双手正伸向自己的臀部以站稳脚跟。
He tried to move back, knowing he should jerk free. But she slid her hands further around him, and in truth he wanted to stay right where he was.
他知道自己应该挺放松的，试图往后退。但是她伸手环抱住了他，事实上他更想待在原地不动。
He dropped the towel far enough to expose her face. She gave a breathy sigh, leaned forward, and laid her cheek against him.
他放低毛巾露出了她的脸。她叹了口气，身子前倾，脸贴到了他身上。
The thin shorts disguised nothing. He flinched with embarrassment and tried to pull away from her again.
薄薄的短裤也没遮住些什么。他尴尬地退缩了一下，试图抽身。
“Let go,” he growled, fearful of hurting her if he pushed too roughly.
“放开我，”他吼道，生怕粗暴地推开她会伤到她。
With her head bowed, he couldn't even warn her off with his eyes. The burning wave of wanting shimmered the entire length of his body.
她低下头，他甚至都不敢用眼神威吓她。熊熊燃烧的欲望之火在体内翻腾。
Who was he kidding? She had to have noticed, and known he wanted her.
他是开玩笑的吧？她肯定也注意到了他想要她。
Fiona shook her head, and the movement of her skin against his made the burn even hotter and more intense.
菲奥娜摇摇头，他们肌肤接触之处燃烧得热烈了。
“Is it just sex, or is it me?” she asked hesitantly.
“是欲望还是我？”她迟疑地问道。
He felt a ridiculous rush of relief. “It's you.”
有些荒谬，但他觉得松了口气。“是你。”
“Oh thank goodness. It's you, too.”
“噢，也幸亏是你。”
There was another small silence, then all the air exploded out of his lungs. With a supreme effort, he tried to make himself push her away but his hands were no longer his to command. His whole body had rocketed out of control. He tried one final time to discourage her. “You're concussed. You don't know what you're doing.”
又是一阵沉默，接着他胸中的空气貌似一涌而出，他竭尽全力，试图推开她，但他的手已经不受控制了。整个身体都失控了。他最后一次试图劝阻她。“你有脑震荡，你不知道自己在做什么。”
Long-suppressed feelings sparked loose like fiery Catherine wheels as she pressed herself against him more firmly. Her arms wrapped tighter.
当她紧紧地贴在他的身上时，压抑已久的情感像烟花一样在瞬间爆发了，她紧紧抱着他。
“Just holding you, Christian. That's all. And I'm sure the concussion's not what's doing it. You've been confusing me and disturbing me for days.”She rubbed her cheek over his navel. “For years really.”
“只是抱着你，克里斯蒂安。就这样。我确信脑震荡不是这样的。这些天来你让我感到困惑，也让我分心。”她的脸在他肚脐上摩挲着。“事实上是多年来一直如此。”
He stood frozen for several more long seconds, silently blessing her and cursing her by turns. Then he began to dry her hair again, imprisoning her head against him with one hand, slowly rubbing the towel over her with the other.
他愣愣地僵站了好几秒钟，心里默默地一会儿称颂着她一会儿有咒骂着她。接着他又开始帮她擦干头发，一只手捧着她的头，另一只手用毛巾慢慢地擦着。
They held each other quietly until Fiona turned her face and feathered her soft lips against his belly. His resolve finally shattered. He hurled the towel away and dropped onto his knees, cupped her face in his hands, and pulled her close.
他们就这样静默着，菲奥娜转过脸来，柔软的嘴唇轻吻上他的腹部。他的决心终于散落一地。他把毛巾扔到一边，跪在地上，双手捧起她的脸，把她拉到身边。
Their mouths melded in a passionate slippery exploration. Years of denied attraction sprang unleashed into a long deep kiss that left them both breathless and way past any thought of restraint.
彼此热烈地亲吻着，充满激情的狡黠和探索。这些年来，彼此拒不承认的吸引力在这一奔涌而出，都凝聚在这一个深深的吻里，此刻都屏住了呼吸，什么都不用去想。
*
Fiona's world imploded. She recognized only his lips, his tongue, his warm questing hands, his intoxicating scent. Incoherent husky groans ripped from both their throats as they writhed against each other, tongues stroking, lips sliding, teeth nipping. The urge to explore and enjoy was fierce and primal, and finally would not be denied.
菲奥娜的世界轰然倒塌。她只能感受到他的嘴唇，他的舌头，他温暖的不断探求的手掌，以及他令人沉醉的味道。他们不断发出沙哑的呻吟，激烈地舌吻着，嘴唇滑动轻咬。发自本能的探索和享受的欲望之火激烈释放，令人无法抗拒。
He wrestled with the buttons down the back of the waterproof coat, and she rocked further forward so he could undo them. She wanted…she wanted…wanted this beautiful man who'd been out of reach for so long.
他迫不及待去解雨衣后面的扣子，她身子前倾以便他顺手些。她想…她想…想要这个长期求而不得的英俊的男人。
She struggled to her feet and Christian followed her up, peeling the stiff crackling fabric away.
她挣扎着站起来，克里斯蒂安也跟着站起来，剥去了那层硬邦邦的雨衣。
Although she was bruised and grazed, the fire in his eyes told her she was beautiful.
尽管她擦伤了还瘀青着，但他眼中的光芒告诉她她很漂亮。
“And you,” she insisted, reaching for the waistband of his swim-shorts. Christian covered her pale hands with his own much darker ones, and shook his head.
“和你，”她坚持伸手摸向他腰间的泳裤。克里斯蒂安深色的双手覆上她苍白的双手，摇了摇头。
“This is enough of me.”
“这就够了。”
Fiona's senses soared into fevered overload. Her eyes roamed over him. Almost everything she'd only imagined until then was finally displayed for her. She raised one hand to stroke his face, but her arm gave a sharp twinge and she settled for his chest instead. Her fingernails traced through the crisp hair covering his hot skin, dislodging the water-diamonds still sparkling there.
菲奥娜感觉自己快坚持不住了，目光在他身上游移。几乎她所有的幻想都在这一刻显现。她举起手抚摸他的脸，但胳膊感到一阵刺痛，于是只好摸了摸他的胸膛。指尖穿过他卷曲的胸毛，触到他发烫的肌肤，水钻般的小水珠依然闪闪发光。
She rubbed a tender thumb over one of his small dark nipples, smiling as she felt it harden at her caress. Then stepped closer and laid her face against his shoulder—smoothing her cheek against silk-covered sinew, breathing in his scent.
她拇指轻柔地拂过他红黑的小乳头，微笑着，因为她觉得它在她的爱抚下变硬了。接着更靠近了，她把脸贴在他的肩膀上，摩挲着他丝般光滑的肌肉，呼吸着他的味道。
Christian stood like stone, allowing her exploration. “You're completely forbidden to me,” he said huskily. “We need to stop right now.”
克里斯蒂安像石头一样僵立在那里，默许她的求索。“你是我的禁区，”他嘶哑地说道，“我们必须立即停下来。”
“I can't,” she said, shooting him a guilty glance. She drew a little away and limped around him, trailing a hand over his hipbone, dropping a soft kiss against his spine and feeling his big body tremble.
“我做不到，”她说，内疚地看了他一眼。手停留在他的髋骨上，轻轻地吻了一下他的脊椎，能够感觉他整个身子都在颤抖
“We mustn't do this, Fee.” His tone was desperate.
“我们不能这样做，菲。”他的语气很绝望。
“No,” she agreed, still stroking his skin, sliding lower. “No—we certainly mustn't. This is not permissible.”
“是，”她同意了，但依然抚摸着他的肌肤，并滑向更低处。“是，我们当然不能这么做，这不可以的。”
Christian swore.
克里斯蒂安嘴里骂着。
“And,” she whispered, “I couldn't stop myself right now, if my life depended on it.”
“而且，”她耳语道，“我只是停不下来，因为它是我活下去的念想。”
*
He gathered her against him, pressing her face against his chest again.
他再次搂着她，把她的脸贴紧自己的胸口。
“I just want to hold you,” he murmured, running the other hand down the length of her back. He reversed the caress for the pleasure of repeating it, and traced the line of her spine downward again.
“我只是想抱着你，”他喃喃道，一只手顺着她的背满满滑下去。他又爱抚地反复这个动作，再次滑过她的脊背。
“We're not going to do this,” he rasped, trying so hard to convince himself. Trying even harder to keep his fingers decently away from where they itched to wander.
“我们不会做什么，”他粗声粗气地说道，努力说服自己。尽最大努力控制自己，保持得体。
“Mmmm…”
“嗯…”
“I have wanted you,” he whispered, “probably since the moment I set eyes on you, although I was so in love with Jan I didn't know it then. You can't imagine how bad that makes me feel…”
“我曾想要你，”他低声说，“也许是从我见到你的那一刻起，虽然我那时深爱着简，但那时我并不明了。你无法想象这令我有多难过…”
“You loved Jan.”
“你爱简。”
“Of course I did.I adored Jan.She was my perfect wife.And on the day I married her, you appeared.” He dropped a small kiss onto Fiona's damp hair. “I still remember that strapless dress. Your hair pinned up to show your lovely neck and shoulders. You were everything that Jan was, and even more besides.”
“当然。我热恋着简。她是个完美的妻子。可我娶她的那天，你出现了。”他吻了一下菲奥娜湿漉漉的头发，“我还记得那件无袖连衣裙。你的头发束起，露出可爱的脖颈和肩膀。简有的，你样样都有，甚至比她更可爱几分。”
His fingers slid up Fiona's arms. “For years now I've wanted that extra‘something', but had the sense to know the only option was to stay well away. Each time I knew you were coming home I had to find an excuse to leave—when I really wanted to be alone with you, talk with you, get to know you.”
他的手指滑过菲奥娜的胳膊。“多年来我一直想要别的‘东西’，但我知道自己唯一的选择就是远离它。每次知道你来家里，我就得找个借口离开——那时我真的很想和你独处，和你闲聊，多了解你。”
“Christian…”
“克里斯蒂安…”
“Yeah. Sad, huh?” He nuzzled her neck again. “But I barely trusted myself to keep my hands off you.” He closed his eyes for a few seconds, remembering the years of frustration.
“嗯。难过，是嘛？”他又用鼻子蹭了蹭她的脖子。“但我几乎不相信自己能理智地与你保持距离。”他闭了一会儿眼，回想起多年来的挫折。
“You hid it well,” Fiona whispered. “And you've got your hands on me now.”
“你藏得真好，”菲奥娜低语道，“现在你抓住我了”
“The timing is hopelessly wrong. Fee, you're beautiful. You attract me more than you can possibly believe. There's nothing I want more in this world than to make love to you.” He kissed her neck, working slowly up to the sensitive edge of her ear. “But not like this. It's far too soon. Jan's memory is way too strong. And you're not in any shape for it anyway.” He kissed her with deep regret. His other arm wrapped more securely around her.
“时时机错得无可救药。菲，你很漂亮。你比你想象中更吸引我。在这个世界上，我最想的便是与你做爱。”他吻着她的脖颈，慢慢挪到敏感的耳朵边缘。“但不是现在这样。它还为时过早。关于简的记忆还太强烈了。况且你现在也不太适合做各种姿势。”他满怀遗憾地吻了她。他另一只手将她稳稳地搂在怀里。
She drew back a little. “So we'll have to be content with just a hug?”
她后腿了一步。“所以我们就仅仅满足于一个拥抱？”
“Does this feel like ‘just a hug' to you?”
“对你来说这‘仅仅是一个拥抱’吗？”
She shook her head. “We could hold each other for a while longer. That wouldn't count as ‘unfaithful' would it?”
她摇摇头。“我们可以再抱一会儿。那不会算作‘不忠’对吧？”
He released a long regretful sigh. “Go back to bed, you poor girl,” he whispered. “You're not up for this. You can barely stand.”
他长叹口气。“回去睡觉吧，可怜的姑娘，”他耳语道，“你现在不方便。你都还站不稳呢。”
*
Fiona felt a fast-flowing torrent of disappointment and disbelief wash through her as he pulled away. She allowed herself to be helped back into the bedroom and assisted onto the bed. Her heart had been hammering with excitement and longing—now she sensed it starting to lurch with loss.
当他拉开她的时候，菲奥娜感到体内一股失望与怀疑的洪流在翻腾。她任由他扶回卧室，安置到床上。她的心如小鹿乱撞，心里充满了激动和渴望——现在她因失落而心律不齐。
She collapsed against the pillows, stricken with regret, as he returned silently to the en suite.She'd been so close to paradise…finally in his arms…but now he'd ripped himself away. Cool shadows flooded in and invaded the bedroom, floating over her as though he'd been bright warm sunshine which was now engulfed by choking cloud.
她瘫倒在枕头上，懊悔不已，他默默地回到了房间。她曾觉得如此地靠近天堂…最后在他怀里…但现在他抽身而去。只留下冰冷的背影，将她侵蚀，仿佛他曾是明亮温暖的阳光，现在却被令人窒息的乌云吞没了。
With great difficulty she raised her aching arms to cover her eyes, trying to hide the searing disappointment that must surely be showing on her woebegone face.
她吃力地举起她那疼痛的臂膀，遮住眼睛，试图掩饰愁眉苦脸的表情。
A few seconds later she heard him moving about again, and slid a couple of fingers aside to watch.
几秒钟后，她又听到了他走动的声了，于是从指缝里偷看。
Her heart hitched as Christian strode across to the bedroom door, locked it, and turned toward the huge bed, rubbing himself dry with one of the big white towels.
克里斯蒂安大步走出卧室，锁上门，转身走向大床，用一条白色的大毛巾擦干身子，她心再次悸动。
She registered the locked door only seconds later. Was he…? Would he…?
几秒钟后她打开门锁，他是…？他会…？
Her eyes slid all over him, appreciating his lean strength and beauty…the breadth of his chest and shoulders.
她目光扫过他，欣赏着他瘦削的力量和俊美…宽阔的胸膛和肩膀。
All the breath left her body as she considered possibilities. He'd locked the door because he didn't want them to be discovered. So what was he planning?
当她屏住呼吸想象着各种可能。他锁上了门，因为他不想被看见。那么他打算干什么呢？
She lay waiting and watching as he approached the tumbled bed. She let her hands fall from her face as Christian slowly unbuttoned the front of her sodden nightgown. Then he bent and blotted the towel gently over her bruised shoulders and breasts, her waist, her belly-button—and followed with his lips.
当他走近混乱的床时，她躺在那里等着看着。她把手从脸上拿开，克里斯蒂安正慢慢解开了她湿透的睡衣纽带。接着，他弯下腰，用毛巾轻轻地擦拭着她擦伤的肩膀和胸口，腰，和腹部——接着他亲了上来。
He ran tender fingers over the inflamed graze on her hip, and dropped the softest of kisses there. Cradled her bandaged knee in both his big hands. And kissed her thigh next to the bandage.
他抚过她擦伤发炎的髋部，轻吻了一下。双手捧着她绑着绷带的膝盖，并在大腿旁吻了吻。
“Christian,” she murmured, feeling the frantic pulse of her blood under his lips. She could barely stay still. Every instinct was to grasp his hair and pull him closer.
“克里斯蒂安，”她喃喃道，感觉自己的血液在他的嘴唇下翕动。她几乎无法动弹。本能地抓住他的头发，拉近他。
She moaned as his bristled cheek rasped down and his hot mouth trailed small kisses over her yearning skin.
她呻吟着，拉近他那布满胡茬儿的脸蛋儿，他热吻上她那充满渴望的肌肤。
“Hold that thought, Fee,” he whispered. “Maybe when you're well again, and some time has gone by. But I can't take you yet.”
“等等，菲，”他耳语道，“也许等你好了，等过些日子。但我现在还不能要你。”
聚合中文网 阅读好时光 www.juhezwn.com
小提示:漏章、缺章、错字过多试试导航栏右上角的源