But it was nice to see them.
"Hey, Georgia," my cousin Lily said. She was in fifth grade and was really, really excited about going to school with me next year. "Did you get my e-mail?"
"I haven't checked in a while." I took my coat off. I remembered the silent apartment I'd experienced a few hours earlier and wondered if I'd ever experience that again.
"Oh, it was about electives. They're already starting to send us stuff about what electives we want. So I was thinking ceramics or maybe theater arts. What do you think? What do you take?"
I exhaled, probably a little too loudly. I didn't want to hurt Lily's feelings, but I wasn't in the mood to talk about school.
I just wanted to talk about fun stuff, like the party and my friends, and sledding tomorrow. And I wanted to lie on my bed and think. Think happy thoughts about Kevin and replay our conversation over and over again in my head.
It was almost ten thirty; a perfectly respectable time to go to sleep, even if it was a Friday night.
"I say ceramics, but let me think on it. I'm tired, so I'm gonna head in. Good night everyone!"
I felt happy that for once I didn't feel bad about going to sleep when people were over. Usually I stayed up and talked and answered a million questions. Maybe going to bed was a little weird, but it was what I wanted to do and so I did it and didn't worry about it. That felt good.
As I was falling asleep, I wondered about tomorrow and the sledding and if PBJ would really show up. I hoped so for Olivia's sake.
And for once, I was really looking forward to Monday. I didn't want the weekend to go so fast, but in a way I did. I wondered what school would be like on Monday. Kevin and me in class together. I knew I could talk to him, so I wanted to do it again.
His lunch table was next to mine. We always passed on the lunch line. I'd say hi, and he'd say hi back. And then who knows?
I felt like there were a million possibilities. For once I felt excited, empowered, capable, instead of nervous and wimpy and scared.
I wasn't quite sure how it happened, but I was so happy that it did.
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